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But even if you are a Christian, there are still a thousand more ways to subtly or blatantly reject God’s wisdom and fall into sin.The key will be to lean on other Christians who know you best, love you most, and have a proven record of telling you when you are making a mistake or wandering away from God’s will for you.Fight the impulse to date in a corner by yourselves, and instead draw one another into those important relationships.Double down on family and friends — with affection, intentionality, and communication — while you’re dating.The people willing to actually hold me accountable in dating have been my best friends.I’ve had lots of friends over the years, but the ones who have been willing to press in, ask harder questions, and offer unwanted (but wise) counsel are the friends I respect and prize the most.For many of us, if we’re honest, it really doesn’t matter who’s offering the advice as long as it confirms what we thought or wanted in the first place.We think we’re leaning on others as we wade into all the material online, but we’re often just surrendering to our own cravings and ignorance.
But to be accountable is to be authentically, deeply, consistently known by someone who cares enough to keep us from making mistakes or indulging in sin.The scary reality is that we can find an answer somewhere to justify what we want to do — right or wrong, safe or unsafe, wise or unwise.The advice we choose might be from a book by a doctor, or a random conversation with someone at church, or a blog post by a teenager, or just something we found on Pinterest.These guys didn’t guard me from every mistake or failure — no one can — but they played a massive role in helping me mature as a man, a boyfriend, and now as a husband.
And I wish I would have listened to them more in dating.
Most people will float along with you because they’re excited for you, but you need a lot more than excitement right now — you have plenty of that yourself.